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Fatwa CenterThe boy she raises up has problems in his studies
Question
I am raising up a kid now 11 years old coming from a poor uneducated family. He's clever and I moved him a year ago to a very good school. The problem is that he's not integrated among his friends at school and they always make fun of him that he comes from a poor family. This is affecting his concentration on his studies and his grades are not good and he is not telling the truth about them we have always to discover the bad grades. He was once very good student, honest and telling everything. Now he started to hate school. I am so close to him but I feel helpless as I live abroad and can't be close enough at this time. Please tell me what to do and how can we save a small kid from this social pressure and let him concentrate on his studies and not lie? I pray that he is not going to turn to a bad person and I want to help him as much as I can. I talked to the school but I am not sure if they are so careful about this issue, they are angry as he is not doing well in his studies and he is also naughty at school with his mates these days. Please give me an advice and God rewards you Inshaa Allaah.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
Pedagogues mentioned that there are many reasons for children not getting good marks at school, and that there are many factors affecting this. Among these factors are: Intellectual factors, psychological factors, physical factors, and social factors. It is only the school and the home [parents] who may monitor these factors in the child and find out the reasons, and then try to find out the solutions for them. Among the directives that are mentioned by the pedagogues and which should be followed are:
1- Checking the student's homework and helping him in doing them.
2- Supervising his behaviour and his relationship with his classmates.
3- Preparing the means which will help him improve his talents.
4- Helping him achieve his objective if this does not contradict the Islamic principles, and not obliging him to do things which he does not like.
5- Not using force in dealing with him except in necessity.
6- Helping him organize his time.
Finally, one important factor should be mentioned, which is that the parents should be keen on nurturing the child on Islamic principles and rites. The child's cultivator should be an example for him, in addition to looking for a suitable and pious social environment for him. If there are some Islamic schools which apply the Islamic rites and principles, then this is more appropriate for him.
Allaah Knows best.
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