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She thinks her husband died as a martyr and she wants to be with him

Question

My fiancée and my husband has died as a martyr on 14 Feb. 2005, almost from 3 months and my heart is really aching me for loosing him. I would like to know if we will be gathered again at heaven as a wife and husband, it is what I'm asking God for. Will I meet him and marry him again at heaven? Is he able to hear me when I talk with him? Will he hear and feel me when I go to his grave? Where is his soul now? How can I reach him? Can he feel my pain and tears? I only want to be with him, I'm missing him so much, and I don't know what to do without him. I always pray and read Quran and ask God to be gathered at heaven and to make all our dreams real. Its what I'm longing for now. Can this be real? I need to know about martyrdom more and about life in heaven.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.

First of all, we do not understand what you mean by "my fiancé and my husband" because before the marriage contract is concluded, a fiancé is not called a husband, and a husband is not called a fiancé. Anyway, if this deceased person is your husband, we say: "Inna lillaahi ma akhath, walahu ma a'ta, wakullu shayin 'indahu bi-ajalin musamma…faltasbiri waltahtasibi."

(Verily to Allaah, belongs what He took and to Him belongs what He gave, and everything with Him has an appointed time…so be patient and hope for Allaah’s reward). So, we advise you to be patient as Allaah says (which means): {Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: "Truly, to Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return." They are those on whom are the Salawat (i.e. who are blessed and will be forgiven) from their Lord, and (they are those who) receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided ones.}[Quran 2:156-157]. Allaah further says (which means): {Only those who are patient shall receive their rewards in full, without reckoning.}[Quran 39:10]. Moreover, it is confirmed that the Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: "The greatness of the extent of the reward is proportional to the greatness of the affliction. When Allaah loves some people, He afflicts them. So, those of them who are content get the reward of being content while those who get angry get the punishment of being discontent." [At-Tirmithi] So we advise you to be patient and to fear Allaah and be pleased with His Decree and Predestination so that you will not lose your reward.

As regards whether you will be together with him in Paradise, the answer is that if both the husband and wife enter Paradise, Allaah will gather them together. Indeed Allaah says about the angels that they supplicate for the believers saying (which means): {Our Lord, and admit them to gardens of perpetual residence which You have promised them and whoever was righteous among their fathers, their spouses and their offspring. Indeed, You are All-Mighty, the All-Wise.}[Qur'an 40:8].

The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) said: "The wife will be with her late husband in this life [If she enters Paradise]." [Al-Bayhaqi]

As regards whether or not he could hear you when you talk to him, and feels you, the answer is what Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  him said: 'In general the dead hears the live. This does not necessarily mean that they could hear all the time as they may hear at one particular time and not at another time. Even a live person, sometimes he may hear the speech of a person who is addressing him, and sometimes he may not hear him because of some obstacles.'

The Prophet  sallallaahu  `alayhi  wa  sallam ( may  Allaah exalt his mention ) legislated for his nation to greet [to say 'Salaam' to] the people of the graveyard when one visits them, to say: "Assalaamu 'Alaykum ahlad-diyaari minal-mu'mineena walmuslimeen" (Salaam be upon you all, O inhabitants of the graves, amongst the believers and the Muslims.) This is a message to those who hear. Ibn Abu Ad-Dunya said in a chapter entitled "The Graves" [in one of his books], he wrote a chapter sub-titled 'The knowledge of the dead about the visit of the live people.' He mentioned many statements of the companions and righteous predecessors  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  them which suggest in general that the dead hears and is pleased with the presence of the visitors at his grave. Please refer to Fatwa: 84400 about the ruling on women visiting the graves and the conditions for the permissibility of the visit.

As regards where his soul is now, the answer is that it is only Allaah Who knows this. Allaah says (which means): {And there is no creature on earth but that upon Allaah is its provision, and He knows its place of dwelling and place of storage.}[Quran 11:6]. "Its place of dwelling" is interpreted to be Paradise or Hellfire. However, if a person dies as a believer, it is expected that he will be amongst the people of Paradise.

We advise you to supplicate to Allaah to forgive him and be patient, and there is no harm for you to supplicate to Allaah to gather you with him in Paradise. We also advise you, if any person whose religion and moral conduct are pleasing asks you for marriage, to accept him and marry him as he might be a comfort to you in this life instead of the deceased. Indeed the female companions  may  Allaah  be  pleased  with  them and other righteous female believers may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them remarried after their husbands died, and there is no harm in this as this is not considered being unfaithful to the previous husband.

Please refer to Fataawa: 89399 and 88945 about the different types of martyrdom, and Fatwa: 88769 about the reward of the martyr, and Fatwa: 89756 about who is the martyr.

Allaah Knows best.

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