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Fatwa CenterShe wants to stop masturbating
Question
I am 44 years old and not married. I have engaged in masturbation for a long time. My parents did not arrange for me to marry. Since my friend told me about her wedding night I have had this habit. I cannot subdue my desires. There is no one who can help me. Is this Haram? What can I do now? I have tried many times to leave this practice but failed. Please help me.
Answer
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.
The delay until this age in getting married, and the failure of your family in arranging your marriage is not an excuse to resort to masturbation, as doing so is Haram.
Allah Says (interpretation of meaning): {And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts) Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, for then, they are free from blame; But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors;}[23:5-7].
The interpreters of the meaning of the Holy Qur'an say that the Saying of Allah "Whoever seeks beyond that" includes all sorts of fulfilling one’s desires outside the lawful bonds of marriage. What you have to do now is:
1) To try to find a husband quickly, this is the best solution to your problem. Do not delay this if you find a lawful way.
2) You have to remember the punishment of Allah, because masturbation is a disobedience of Allah, and Allah may punish the person who does it.
3) To strengthen the relationship with Allah, and be keen on performing supererogatory prayers and fasting.
4) To cut relationships with bad women and stay away from all that leads to have a relationship with them.
5) To remember what masturbation could cause as physical and health problems.
6) To stay away from everything that incites sexual desires, like stories, film series, songs, etc.
7) To choose women friends of good character.
8) To avoid mixing with men.
In conclusion, we hope, dear sister, that you will endeavour and try hard to get rid of this masturbation, relying on Allah and making a lot of Du’a day and night by relying on this advice. Fear Allah, as Allah makes a way out for those whoever fear Him.
Allah knows best.
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