My question is regarding an issue that most Muslim brothers of my age are facing while they are living in a non-Muslim country, seeking marriage in a proper Islamic manner but trying to avoid the social complexity of it. We all know the great difficulty we Muslims face in order for us to keep away from Haram and to follow the proper path of our religion, and getting married is the only means for us to be secured from falling into our common sins. My case is a case of a 25 years old male Muslim with the intention to get married, Insha Allah. We will go to the mosque and two witnesses will be there for the ceremony, but neither my parents nor her family will be present or aware of this at least for the coming months. If you ask me why I will simply say for reasons that they will add more obstacles to our marriage which might delay it or even cancel the whole idea and that is not how I plan to make it; a simple gathering blessed by God without no parties or any means of Israf. If possible I would like to know the teaching of Islam as well as the opinion of Imam Malik concerning male and female marriage without the knowledge of their Awlia, or parents.
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
The marriage of a woman without having the consent of her guardian is invalid, according to the view of the majority of the Muslim scholars; Imam Maalik is one of them. The Prophet said: “Any woman who gets married without the consent of her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid. If he consummated the marriage with her [i.e. had sex with her], then he must pay her the Mahr (bridal money) due to the sexual intercourse made lawful with her.” [Abu Daawood, At-Tirmithi, and Ibn Maajah]
The majority of Muslims agree with this ruling and act according to it. No doubt, the Prophet repeated the words of invalidity of such marriage thrice, to emphasize the invalidity of such marriage.
Therefore, we advise our Muslim brothers to avoid such a marriage regardless of the country where they are living. They should set a good example through their deeds; calling to the way of Allah through their actions before their words.
As for the obstacles mentioned in the question, then all of you brothers should stand against them, join hand to hand to uproot them and to eliminate them from the society instead of keeping silent and seeking unlawful ways.
For more benefit on a woman’s marriage without guardian, please refer to Fataawa 92758, 85057, 226429, 132754, and 269080.
Allah knows best.
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