my family (my parents and my brother) are racist and always think little about my husband who is from another culture (eventhough he is a Muslim also). They didn't stop me when I married him, they agreed with the marriage and everything. But ever since after the marriage, they show so much racism and they put him down. My husband is a great husband and he is a wonderful father to my baby. He is a very pious man and prays 5 times and he fears Allah. He feels very hurt with the way my family treats him and I feel so hurt too. When my mom visited me after I delivered a baby (we stayed in another city from my parents), she quickly ran back to her home because she was not able to live with our lifestyle (because we are poor) and she didn't like my husband, leaving me alone with a newborn baby. And I visited to their city and their home twice since after my baby was born (now he is 1 yr old), and every time my husband was at their home, they were very unhappy with him even though my husband was so kind to him and didn't do anything wrong. My parents love me and they helped us a lot even financially. My parents were like watching his every move and always finding faults in him and said bad things about him to me and made me cry. And my brother doesn't like my baby because I gave my baby an Arabic name that he doesn't like and he started to call my baby some random names and I told him to only call the name I gave. That angered him so much and he told me never to come back to my parents home and never bring my baby and husband there. He said we are nothing but trouble to our parents. I feel very hurt by it. My parents are on my brother's side as always and always think I m always at fault. I would like to ask question that, if I disobey my parents in this way (by being against racism and injustice), will I go to hell since Jannah is under my mom's feet?
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
Racism is a form of the fanaticism of the Pre-Islamic era that Islam dispraises and calls for fighting it. The people are from Aadam, and Aadam is from dust and there is no superiority of anyone over another except in terms of Taqwa (piety and righteousness). Allaah The Almighty says (what means): {O mankind, indeed We have created you from male and female and made you peoples and tribes that you may know one another. Indeed, the most noble of you in the sight of Allaah is the most righteous of you. Indeed, Allaah is Knowing and Acquainted.}[Quran 49: 13]
For more benefit about racism, kindly refer to Fataawa 84769 and 86205.
Having known that racism is something evil, it is obligatory to denounce it whether it comes from the parents or from anyone else. Denouncing evil has nothing to do with being undutiful to one’s parents, but kindness, leniency, wisdom and good instruction should be adopted while doing that. Also, it is not permissible to make the bad treatment of the parents an excuse to treat them badly for the children's duty to be dutiful to them and to treat them in a good way can never be waived. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 86982.
On the other hand, your brother has no right to call your son a name other than what you have called him. Also, he has no right to prevent you from visiting your family; rather, this is a call for severing ties of kinship. You should maintain ties with your kinship, even if your brother does not accept that. There is no blame on you if you take your husband and son along with you, even if your brother does not accept that. Anyway, he should be advised to fear Allaah The Almighty and renounce such hateful manners.
Allaah Knows best.
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