Arranging a meeting between a fiance and his fiancee
29-6-2004 | IslamWeb
Question:
Please in this part of the world parents first arrange a meeting date called introduction which is meant for the intending husband and wife's family to get to know one another before the day of Nikah, I want to know if this is acceptable in the Shariah.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds, I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all him companions.
If a man asks the hand of the woman for marriage, he is permitted to look at her to see what is permissible and what will encourage him to marry her without staying in seclusion with her. He can look at her either without her knowledge, or with her knowledge in the presence of her Maharim (non-marriageable relatives). If the purpose is met, then he has to lower his gaze. The evidence about the permissibility of looking at a woman for the purpose of marriage is the report of At-Tirmithi and Al-Nasaa'ee 
that Al-Mugheerah Ibn shu'bah 
got engaged with a woman, and the Prophet 
told him: "look at her; this is more appropriate for bridging between you."
Abu Daawood and Al-Haakim reported that Jaabir Ibn 'Abdullaah narrated that the Prophet said: "If one of you proposes to a woman, and he can look (at some parts) of her (body), to see what will encourage him to marry her, then he may do so on."
Therefore, there is no harm in organizing such a meeting between a man who asks for the hand of a woman in marriage and this woman, in the presence of her Maharim, without any prohibited matters, like music, mixing between men and women, not being modestly dressed in Hijab (women), and so on.
If the man, who is proposing for marriage, has looked at her, he has to avoid sitting with her until the marriage contract is concluded, as she remains an alien woman to him.
In many Muslim countries, people had become very lenient and too tolerant, regarding the meeting of a fiancé with his fiancée, without supervision. They let him meet many times and go out together wherever they wish, under the pretext of getting to know each other better.
This is really a tribulation and a widespread mischief. So we draw the attention of the questioner to this fact. However, if the marriage contract is established, and all its conditions and pillars are met, then she is his wife, and he can look at her and be in seclusion with her.
Allah knows best.