If you are uncomfortable about the future of this marriage, then leave it
9-3-2011 | IslamWeb
Question:
There is no doubt that marrying an older woman is not prohibited or disliked under Sharee‘ah (Islamic law). It is even easy for me to marry a woman who is older than me, but I am doubtful about the success of this marriage and its future.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
The final word in this regard is that of our Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, who said, "A woman is married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty or her religion. So win the religious one, lest you should lose." [Al - Bukhari and Muslim]
Therefore, you should not hesitate if the woman whom you want to marry is righteous and pious, as the age difference is insignificant as long as the spouses are pious, righteous, religious and know their rights and duties.
Nevertheless, if the age difference annoys you, then do not go ahead with something with which you are not satisfied but search for a younger righteous woman to marry.
Note that if you marry this woman while you are not convinced or unsatisfied you will be harming yourself and the woman who risks her future by accepting you as her husband.
In any case, a Muslim must rely on Allaah The Almighty and entrust his affairs with Him, since this will relieve him from fears and worries. One should be certain that the future is in the Hands of Allaah The Almighty and that He will never let his righteous servants down; on the contrary, He is always with them with His support and help.
Allaah The Almighty Says (what means):
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{Whoever works righteousness, whether male or female, while he (or she) is a true believer (of Islamic Monotheism) verily, to him We will give a good life (in this world with respect, contentment and lawful provision), and We shall pay them certainly a reward in proportion to the best of what they used to do (i.e. Paradise in the Hereafter)} [Quran 16:97]
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{And those who strive for Us - We will surely guide them to Our ways. And indeed, Allaah is with the doers of good} [Quran 29:69]
Allaah The Exalted also Says in the Qudsi Hadeeth (sacred narration), “I am as my slave expects Me to be, and I am with him when he remembers Me." [Al - Bukhari and Muslim]
Finally, we draw the attention of the honorable questioner that the believer should not go ahead with anything until he has performed Istikhaarah (guidance-seeking-prayer).
May Allaah guide us all to what pleases Him.
Allaah Knows best.