Attending a Function When a Girl Reaches Puberty
8-9-2019 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamu alaikum
In my village people have a practice of conducting functions when the girl attains puberty. They hold a grand feast and invite relatives and dress her up. Is this permissible in islam. Can i attend such a function? If i dont attend my family members say that i am breaking family ties. I told them that i woill not attend the function but will come in the evening and meet everyone.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
It seems that this feast is held as a custom and not as an act of worship, because it is not a religious rite by which one intends to get closer to Allah.
Since this is the case, there is no harm in holding such a feast or attending it unless it is something which is taken from the non-Muslims and is particular to them, in a way that the case of the one who organizes it resembles the case of non-Muslims and he imitates them, in which case it becomes prohibited. Otherwise, there is no harm in it.
The evidence for the permissibility of such customs is applying the principle rule; which is the permissibility, and what is Islamically considered is the objective of such customs and the benefits that result therefrom.
It is known that many customs and occasions arose during the first generation after the death of the Prophet yet the scholars did not rule them to be forbidden or illegitimate. An example of this is the banquet that was organized for the woman in postpartum period [after giving birth to a child], when a child is circumcised, when welcoming someone who was travelling, at the completion of the construction of a house. As a matter of fact, they even organized such banquets when a child started to have teeth.
In conclusion, we do not see anything wrong in honoring the invitation you mentioned in the question. Rather, the one who intends to keep ties with kinship and to strengthen the family bonds, may be rewarded.
Allah knows best.