If a girl accepts your case, marry her!

5-5-2011 | IslamWeb

Question:

Is it permissible for a man to give up the idea of marriage completely and be patient with the Decree of Allaah especially because he knows that he suffers from impotence? It should be noted that he is twenty-five years old and has never had sexual intercourse.

Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.

 

The questioner does not clarify the reason behind giving up the idea of marriage. It should be known that it is permissible not to marry if the person does not fear committing sexual sins. The Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, urged those who can marry to do so. He said: “O young people! Whoever among you are able to marry should marry, as it is better for lowering for the gaze and more protective of the private parts (chastity).” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

According to the majority of scholars, the command on the aforementioned Hadeeth (narration) and the verse in which Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {marry those that please you of [other] women} [Quran 4:3] indicates a recommendation for those who do not fear committing unlawful sexual intercourse. [Bidaayat Al-Mujtahid by Ibn Rushd]

The ability to marry in this Hadeeth refers to potency and the ability to pay for the costs of marriage. Hence, we advise you to supplicate Allaah The Almighty frequently, perform guidance-seeking prayer (Istikhaarah) and consult doctors. According to a Fatwa issued by Ibn Taymiyyah and other scholars  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them; if you suffer from a disease that prevents you from sexual intercourse, then, you should not marry a woman without informing her because sexual intercourse is one of the foremost rights of the wife.

However, this does not prevent you from marriage if you can afford the costs of financial maintenance, because there are many benefits in marriage. Perhaps you will find a widow or a divorced woman who has children and has a desire to marry someone like you. You may find a woman who has no desire for sexual intercourse due to her old age.

If you find a woman who accepts your conditions, then, marry her perhaps Allaah The Almighty may heal you.

If you decide not to marry, you should do your best to direct the most of your financial abilities and physical energies in a way that pleases Allaah The Almighty. So, you should busy yourself with seeking and spreading knowledge and gaining money and spending it for the sake of Allaah The Almighty and relieving the impoverished people. You should follow the example of the righteous predecessors who did not marry but employed their abilities for the sake of high goals such as Imaam An-Nawawi and Shaykh Al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah  may  Allaah  have  mercy  upon  them.

Allaah Knows best.

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