Wrote and uttered expressions meaning that he terminated his marriage

12-5-2010 | IslamWeb

Question:

Assalamu Alaykum,
I'm married to my cousin in an arranged marriage performed very much against my wish. I have had too much negative vibes / feelings about her physical compatibility (Chemistry) from the first time I saw her after our Nikkah. My marriage has been a big mujjahhada for me.
Situation 1:
My wife had gone home and I had to bring her to live with me in the city where I was working (until then, I used to visit home only during the holidays for couple of days). The very thought of staying with her for longer period was too much for me to bear and I decided to terminate the marriage. So, I refused to bring her from her home to
our home. When my father insisted that I bring her to me, I told my father “I can’t live with her”, “She must not come to me” “I can’t bring her back here and let her remain there only” “I would rather prefer to die than living with her” “arrange to terminate this Nikkah (as I was under the impression that for divorce to be valid it must be pronounced 3 times in front of witnesses).” etc. I do not remember exactly all the words I used, although, the ones I have quoted here are fairly accurate. Are these words KINAYA? I said these to mean that the marriage was over as for as I was concerned. Since I said such words with the intention and purpose of terminating the Nikah, did they effect a divorce?
Situation 2:
I wrote a letter to my father-in-law the following with the clear intention of terminating the nikkah.
" ... I'm firm that we can not live together any more. Hence, I have decided to release her (wife's name) with "Talaaq". Please treat this letter as a notice of my talaaq from me. Please do not attempt anything to make me change my mind as there is no change in my decision"
Then after few days, when family applies emotional pressure, I said "as for as I'm concerned, it is over" (intending divorce)
Did divorce take place? If yes, what type divorce, talaak-e-rajee or talaak-e-bain?
Jazak Allah
Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allaah exalt his mention ) is His slave and Messenger.

 

These expressions which you wrote (to your father-in-law) that you do not wish your wife to live with you any more or that you decided to release your wife with divorce are among the metaphors of divorce. Also, your statement (to your family) “As far as I am concerned, it is over.”, is not a clear statement of divorce, so divorce does not take place unless you had intended it (by what you wrote and said).

For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 89894.

If we presume that you had intended divorce in the above situations, then if with the second and third divorce, you wanted to confirm the first one, then it is one revocable divorce that takes place. But if you had intended to initiate a new divorce with the second and third divorce, then the jurists may Allaah have mercy upon them differed in opinion in regard to repeating the word of divorce three times if they are not intervened by him taking back his wife whether divorce takes place as three divorces or as only one divorce. The majority of the scholars may Allaah have mercy upon them are of the view that divorce takes place as three divorces and this is the view we adopt here in Islamweb. However, some jurists may Allaah have mercy upon them are of the view that divorce takes place once. For more benefit on the types of divorce, please refer to Fatwa 82541.

Allaah Knows best.

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