Her husband is a hypocrite and a gambler
25-5-2009 | IslamWeb
Question:
My husband pretends to be a good Muslim. We both teach at a Muslim school. I work hard and honestly, every day doing my best, every day questioning myself in the evening if I have done my best and if I have done the right thing by my students.
I cannot explain how terribly painful it is to live with a hypocrite. Though my husband can teach well, he is not a sincere person. He cusses the students and their parents and he thinks that he is better than everyone else.
He seldom tells the truth and when he does I can never be sure because he tells so many lies. He has a 2nd wife that lives overseas but pretends that he has no relations with her, yet he calls her and they correspond by e-mail regularly.
The worst thing about my husband is his growing addiction to gambling. He spends is whole paycheck at a casino about 100 miles away. He begs me to go with him but I refuse because I feel that gambling is so haram and casinos are places of Hell.
I have been supporting my husband ever since we married. We have been married for 6 years now. He is never responsible for anything...of course why should he care because he knows I will pay for everything. But I am not physically able to keep supporting him. What if I get sick? I know I can't trust him to take care of me.
His addiction to gambling is killing me but does not seem to bother him at all. He spends the rest of the month looking at my salary and me and trying to get money from me to pay for his gambling. I feel like I am drowning. I don't know what to do. He refuses to get help. He knows what he is doing is haram but he doesn't care at all. He pretends at work that he is the epitome of ideal Islamic behavior. But I know he puts on an act every day and I know what kind of person he really is.
Ruth
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, may Allaah reward you for being keen on working hard and honestly, for doing your job as best as you could, and for questioning yourself whether or not you have done what you should have done.
On the other hand, if what you mentioned about your husband is true, then he is wrong in many aspects:
1- Claiming to be a righteous person while he does evil; Allaah Says (what means): {O you who have believed, why do you say what you do not do? Great is hatred in the sight of Allaah that you say what you do not do.}[Quran 61:2-3]
2- His bad language and cursing his students: ‘Abdullaah ibn Mas’ood 
narrated that the Prophet said: "A believer is neither a slanderer nor a curser, nor is he obscene or vulgar." [Ahmad and At-Tirmithi] Indeed, this is inappropriate for him as he is educating those students, and he should be a good example for them.
3- Lying too much; the Prophet said: "Beware of lying, for lying leads to vice (wickedness, evil-doing), and vice leads to Hellfire, and a man continues to tell lies till he is written before Allaah, as a major liar." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
4- Gambling, which is a forbidden matter; Allaah Says (what means): {O you who have believed, indeed, intoxicants, gambling, [sacrificing on] stone alters [to other than Allaah], and divining arrows are but defilement from the work of Satan, so avoid it that you may be successful.}[Quran 5:90]
Hence, we advise you to endeavour to admonish him in the light of the above evidence as Allaah may guide him thanks to you.
As regards helping him with money, then you are not obliged to do so; rather, he is obliged to spend on you. If you are sure or you predominantly think that he takes the money from you to gamble, then it is not permissible for you to help him because Allaah Says (what means): {Help you one another in virtue, righteousness and piety but do not help one another in sin and transgression.}[Quran 5:2]
Allaah Knows best.